Two days this week I had salad for breakfast. Salad!!! Who am I?
and not even like the iceberg lettuce that I was raised on but one day it was beet leaves. Beet leaves! I didn't even know those were edible!
Why? Cause I wanted to. Cause I like to eat healthy and it was yummy. and i'm a big fan of doing what you want.
This week I also ate a very large amount of dark chocolate salted caramel Dove chocolate lest you start to worry. They never put enough in those bags. And I still bit my nails terrible during all that time on the freeway this week, so hey, a work in progress.
I've known valentine's was coming all week, and shortly after our 15th wedding anniversary. And all I can think of is WOW what a difference a year makes. In such a different place than last year and last year you could not have convinced me I would have been at peace in a year. That is a miracle to me.
So we can change. We can start eating salad for breakfast for crying out loud!
And we can heal and love and change.
Negativity, cynicism and doubt can still creep in if we let it but I kinda think I don't even care. I've gotten good at giving those feelings a good drop kick when I feel them coming closer. If I hear bad news in the future I'm like whatever thats real life, we will work through it.
I have learned that with God we can survive whatever life throws at us. Not that I want to find out how much I can survive, I'm good with my little taste tests. No really.
So everyday when I pray I say thank you for my heart. For the gift of mending because I know it did not come from me. Although we can desire it and do the work that is required, it is God who ultimately will put it there.
Life is good. It is far from perfect and we have far to go but it is not being wasted. Even if my whiner of the year award might be in the mail somedays, thats okay too.
Even if my sister moves far away and my closest immediate family is now 20 hours away, I will deal with it. Even if its too far to travel and expensive I know we can be in each others lives somehow. I'm just grateful that I get to live with my six favorite people (the daily head butting aside)
After 15 years Jason finally gave me exactly the chocolates I wanted. A whole dang box of them. I was like, wow, he knows me! Without me having to give him a note to remind him :) Which is totally fine if you are still at that point people. Notes, reminders, they can be essential. Half butterscotch squares and half the dark chocolate, marshmallow, carmel ones. Its a beautiful sight.
So I have no gross nougats or coffee chocolates to throw out.
See, change is possible ;) Its a valentine's miracle.
And when I want my favorite flowers, well I just buy those myself.