Wednesday, April 1, 2015

The verdict

Oh man this day just got funnier. 

When I picked up paisley from preschool I realized I forgot it was crazy hair day and the Easter party and the goodies she was supposed to bring. Oh well. 

Had some good reminders today and some added sunshine. (Ps bet my kids are gonna be real good tomorrow cause they are scared mom is gonna lose it funny and also true so that should last at least one day) 

And got some gem of pictures. The big girls got pranked at activity days for April fools... Brown Es . Good one Anna!

And this one is from a relief society trip to palm dale to see our friend Kayla...this is funny Jenn trying to crouch and me trying to be tall!  

And 40 lbs of chicken got put away and Becky o had to take chicken goo off my leg. Done! 

Stay at Home Mom Gone Crazy

Its 8:35 a.m. and while I looked like a crazy, lazy woman dropping my kids off to school with bed head, no makeup, not matching pjs and shoes half way on…no I have not just woken up…

On the contrary I have been up since about 5:25 a.m. and for the last three hours have…
(order of events a bit scrambled)

read my scriptures (ironically searching the subject of charity in the book of mormon and the bible…something that I failed to practice this morning as shown in later morning tantrums)
figured out how to pay for least amount of spring pictures and settled on two sheets each kid and then filled out necessary paperwork for each child and wrote checks
located treasure box items for darbys class that her teacher requested and put in her backpack
found another toy on top of the fridge that I dusted off that i realized i could stick in treasure box toy
reminded kids to turn in pictures and payment or else that would be us stealing them
located a check from a paparazzi sale I had misplaced
brushed my teeth
did darbys hair
got frustrated at and freaked out about baylie refusing to shower and then proceeded to spray her hair with dry shampoo to hide the grease
did baylie's hair
gave baylie antibiotics
gave paisley that purple medicine that I cant' remember the name for her cold
got the kids to do their chores, dishes, laundry, trash
took out the trash in the garage
took rusty out to go to the bathroom
smelled kids breath to check for teeth brushing
punched a hole in heater door after tantrum #2 (not to be confused with tantrum #1)
checked facebook in the locked bathroom while I was cooling off from tantrum #2
had a talk with baylie about if she would tell me her shoes were broken last nite I could have fixed them
had a pity party for all the broken shoes and hand me downs
was mad at myself for pity party and losing temper and remembering my blessings
refused luke's asking to walk to school even though don't blame the kid for wanting to get out of the house early…insert tantrum #3
got chocolate milk out of the downstairs fridge
picked up the clothes in garage that were spilled over from child labor laundry
did paisleys hair
helped baylie find one pair of shoes that were not broken, we never succeeded but at least found the least broken pair
helped with 3 school lunches
put notes in 3 school lunches
supervised what paisley was bringing to preschool for show and tell
helped darby with math homework that I didn't know was unfinished
had luke help me put on baylie's sheets that have been clean but wadded on the floor for over a week
tried to look for super glue to fix baylie's broken shoes, found none
threw a brush in frustration over shower refusal
jason reminding me of my own words about contributing to the weather of our home (sunny vs cloudy)
exchanged words with jason over my lack of self control and me feeling like he was pouring gas on the fire!
made my bed
made darby peanut butter toast
located butter in downstairs fridge for ivys toast (which was her second breakfast after she had cereal)
made 3 apologizes, 2 of them at least very sincere
talked with the kids about moms poor behavior this morning and our effort to budget that I'm having a harder time to conform with
drove the kids to school.
squeezed in a last minute song in the car with the kids to try and mend the morning

now I will try and exercise (cause heaven knows my sanity needs it), shower, apply generous amounts of makeup, eat breakfast…and then to proceed to cut up 40 lbs of chicken that I got on a wholesale deal from a local farm that needs to be taken care of today before it spoils.

thankfully ivy ill be watching animated Robin Hood for at least 1 hour 20 min of that time to allow me at least the exercise part.

okay, insert hour long delay.  I have not yet worked out which is not looking iffy at best.


Divine intervention occurred and I had a random drop off from a friend who was bringing me chocolate she didn't like (a whole other topic) which i ate 6 on the spot (breakfast, check) and we just stood on my porch and just laughed and laughed and laughed and it was exactly what i needed.  We both vented about our mornings and our families that don't understand us and bless you! and bless God for sending you to me to regain some of my fleeting mind!!!  I will be able to survive this and we laughed our heads off at what bad mom my husband thinks I am cause we both know we are great ones despite this horrible morning.

The freaking end.

I think I will continue to go be the glue that makes this family function thank you very much!

Monday, March 30, 2015

Over the hump and also a bit about Relief Society

Feeling a little more even and realized I needed to spend some time with my husband.  I start getting a little frantic when we become like two passing ships.  Just have to make sure we are on the same page sometimes and not feel like we are living two separate lives.

But seriously I can be a grouch.  And hard when you can feel yourself in it and be doing the 'right' things and can't seem to shake it.  I just know it will pass and that part of it was cause I was feeling like the second fiddle.

I don't know if there is such a thing as a low maintenance wife?  We all need to know we are number #1?

Enough on that….

I sure love relief society.  a large part because of who I get to work with but also because I love women I had forgotten.   I love Primary and I'm good at that but wow do I love relief society women especially especially the General Women's Session of Women's conference.  I have done lots of investigating of Mormon women and unbiasedly (I don't know if thats possible really) they are a classy bunch.  Wow.  just Wow.  I think any one of them could rule the world. and shhh…secretly the thing is we really do because a women's influence is so great.  on her family, on her community, and that impacts the world.  Like a ripple in the water.  okay thats as poetic as I can be ;)

So of course I loved to eat a cutesy dinner and then go listen to inspired words by our amazing women leaders!  and to do it with Darby was icing on the cake.

Okay so I didn't take notes, but there were a couple of things I just had to write down.  All the talks were really good and loved the videos too.  The church is true!!!  The gospel of Christ has been restored!  The real one from Christs time!  Its amazing!!!

Okay, so here are some of the highlights.  I wrote no names down :)

The first hymn was how firm a foundation which I know really well because I taught it as the music leader when I was Encino but I didn't know this last verse which touched me so much.

"The soul that on Jesus hath leaned for repose
I will not, I cannot, desert to his foes;
That soul, though all hell should endeavor to shake,
I'll never, no never, I'll never, no never,
I'll never, no never, no never forsake."

Thats how I feel guys.  I am in this til the end.  I am Mormon to my bones.  Such glad to be a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and there is nothing you could say that would sway me.  Okay…now to the talks.

- The first speaker used an analogy of two soda cans (really shouldn't they have been diet coke cans?)
One was full and one was empty.  She tried to crush both of the cans.  The empty one could be crushed with her hand but the full one could not.  Why?  Well it was filled.  We and our families need to be filled with the Spirit and light and the gospel of Christ or we will be break under the pressures of the world.

- God gave us families to help us become what he wants us to be

- one women told a story about meeting sister yazi (spell?) who was native american.  After seeing all the photos on her wall she asked sister yazi how many grandchildren she had.  Sister yazi shrugged her shoulders?  Thinking she didn't understand her sister stephens asked sister yazi's daughter who said, we don't count them.  All children call her grandma.

- We all belong to God's family.

- Be defenders of the proclamation to the family…which is now 20 years old!

- one cute lady told about a mom who went to career day at her son's school as the career of homemaker.  And how had a very creative presentation as she listed all the many things a mother needs to be…a nurse, a teacher, a driver, a chef, ….it was a long list I can't remember.   What a cute mom to show the kids that motherhood is a career to be valued!

- President Eyring told a story about meeting a mother with a baby in her arms who was attending a funeral of a little boy who had died to show her support.  She too had lost her first daughter and when President Eyring asked what her new babies name was the mother quickly said 'Joy.  because joy comes after sorrow."

I pretty much was fighting back tears throughout the whole thing, I was so proud to be there and felt the spirit so strong.  Loved sitting by to my pal April L too.

My friend Susie taught all the little women how to cross stitch that night and Darby is hooked!!! I had tried to teach her and myself but the blind can't lead the blind very well.  Darby is artistic in every single cell of her!

Okay so I typed this already but somehow it got deleted :)  Luke was excited to finally not have to go to the egg hunt and Primary Easter breakfast (which was so gooood by the way).  He went to the youth dodgeball instead (with the teenagers and tweens).  when he got home I asked him how it was and he said, "I'm the man" which I thought was hilarious.  Apparently he was quite the ball catcher and so really helped his team.  I told a girl who was there what he said and she said, 'he really was the man"  Life father like son :) hehehe

Saturday, March 28, 2015

my blog is bipolar

no seriously i think so. Cause its either too boring to write anything.  Or so dang grateful and feel lucky and hunky dory.  Or its like I'm going to run away screaming….

which time do you think it is now hehe…

Seriously though.

yesterday was rough.  rough.  hoping it was hormones :)  pllllllleeeaaase be hormones!!!

But could not shake the funk I was in and think it was just the end of an exhausting week.  And it kicked my butt.

Thankfully finally got some good uninterrupted sleep last night and besides for being very embarrassed for crying ugly in public (don't even ask just be glad you didn't see it) its time for the pity party to be over and back to work.  Right self?  Right?  Did you hear me????

Sometimes feels like I'm failing at everything even though I might know that isn't true sometimes the feeling is hard to shake.  Wondering how did a former crappy babysitter and subpar cleaner become the mother of five and co-head of a busy household?  I swear I still have no idea what I am doing!

But its Saturday…and that means.

no work for Jason yahoooooooooo
no making lunches (i love you children but they might be my nemesis and yes I could make the kids make it themselves its more like a community effort but then i still have to help provide the things in the pantry that will go in them)
no morning rush for backpacks and closed toe shoes…shoes is also my nemesis we either never have enough or cannot find them.  but we always have TONS of them in the wrong size ;)
no double check of the homework
no rushing to do chores before school (I need a better system)
no seminary!! (i'm sure there are lots of blessings for Jason teaching seminary but it is taxing as well)
wow I thought there would be more of these
but feels like more

Okay now gotta go get ready for the Easter pancake breakfast and getting luke to his first stake youth activity (dodgeball).  Excited for the Women's session of General Conference tonite!  And bringing Darby and Baylie.