We all know im not very private right? probably painfully so. why i feel the need to unload to the internet i have no idea. but a wise woman i used to run with ( yes i used to run and have run with quite a few wise women over the years). anyway she and i would discuss the idea of being more honest and upfront. not hiding and sugarcoating. if someone asked you who your day was why do we always say fine?
cause maybe if we opened up a bit more it would let someone else to.
Today I did something that I was nervous to do. That's always good for you right?
I volunteered at the bishops storehouse. Why would that cause me a little panic and worry? Well a few reasons. First of all I had signed up Jason to do it and had other plans that would take some rearranging.
Also because since sometime in October , that is the place where we have been getting 99 percent of our food. And my feelings about that are very close to the surface. And lastly because sometimes i too have a small comfort zone.
But I did it. And it was wonderful. Even ran into my dear friend Jackie while i was there. And was able to drive the spunkiest older lady whom i had the pleasure to meet to get her food order too. And she showed me the ropes.
That place is amazing. There are pictures of Christ on every wall and literally provides new meaning to his name Savior. He provides for our temporal needs as well as spiritual. He is feeding my family... And the food tastes so good.
Imagine a store where money is never exchanged. Where most are volunteers. Where they start their work day with a group prayer and hymn (we sang a humble version of the song have I done any good in the world today?)
Everyone is so happy and nice and grateful. A store where its so efficient and they can fit so much in a small place because there is only one brand of everything.
I wanted to hug them and thank them all for their service. Thank you for feeding me and my children the last 4 months. But I couldn't get it out, just was choking back emotion the whole time.
Breathe... My new friend Roberta told me. Ok I will. That is just what I needed to do today.
To help others get their food. Nobody there knew I have been a customer since Jason always went for us. Not anymore, I love that place but now I feel much more comfortable going there too. Wanna go with me next time to do some service?
I will tell my kids about this experience. Not just today but the period of life when we received. It's like He just wanted to show me all these miracles and blessings. Life is such a funny thing. We are not in charge, only of our actions.
I have always had a strong testimony of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints but now it is like a rock. Solid brick wall. And while I will try and not turn into church lady on you, sure seems like that's the only stuff that really matters.
So put these experiences on my growing list of things I'd never thought i would do or learn. Seems like The Lord sure has a lot to teach me still.
It seems that my days with Jason home might be numbered. Mixed emotions all around and nothing set in stone yet. Keep ya posted .